Alternate title: Are you sharing TMI?

I remember it felt hot that day. Even in July and August, North Belgrade Maine rarely got above 80° and yet on that summer day in 1981, the heat felt oppressive (I say “felt” because a quick search of the farmersalmanac.com tells me I am wrong and it was a seasonal high of 79°).  I was covered in sweat having just canoed at top speed across Salmon Lake with another camper to fill a pail with sand from the beach on the other side. We had paddled all out because there was another canoe with two campers who were on the Grey team racing us. We were the Maroon team and my maroon tee-shirt was soaked with sweat and was two shades darker than normal across the chest where the word K-E-N-N-E-B-E-C was neatly printed in all capital, block letters.

As we ran up to the designated hand off spot on the shore and passed the baton to the runner who would sprint to the next event, I found the closest tree, leaned against it, and tried to catch my breath. A few members of both teams were standing around the canoe area and I asked one of my Maroon teammates when he thought the swimming would start as I was also competing in the team medley relay, swimming butterfly. When he said “in less than 10 minutes”, I blurted out “I’ll never make it, Grey is going to destroy us”.

Enter Bernie Lemonick, the owner of Camp Kennebec and a former defensive guard at University of Pennsylvania from 1947-1951. Bernie had been named an All-American multiple seasons, and even played in the 1950 college all-star game against the Cleveland Browns. He had graduated from Penn with a BA in Economics (with honors) and every camper knew that he did this despite an environment where many Ivy league schools were still not admitting many Jews, and some of the teams that Penn played (like Wisconsin and Army) probably didn’t have enough Jews at the entire school to field a minion let alone a football team. He played in one of those leather helmets with no face guard. Needless to say, when it came to competing and grit, he had a boat load of street cred.

Bernie asked me to step over to a quiet area away from the other boys. He put his arm around my shoulders in spite of the sopping wet shirt and angled our bodies so that no one could see our expressions or hear what he was saying to me. Calmly he said “I couldn’t help but overhear you back there and I’m betting some of the Grey team heard you as well.” I nodded in agreement and he said “telling your opponent your weakness only makes them bolder. No-one knows how you feel inside except for you. In my experience, you are better served by continuing to try your best and not declaring that you are defeated before you even start.”

I wish I could tell you that I remember what I said but I don’t. I do remember that we actually won the medley, and that I was not as tired as I thought.  I didn’t win it for us. Jeff Allman, a tremendous swimmer (and runner) was so fast that he built a lead the Grey team could not make up.

Fast forward 30 years and I can tell you that I have seen the wisdom of Bernie’s advice again and again in business competition, negotiations, and personal challenges. I have seen it proven in both the positive and negative cases. I’ve listened as public companies disclose their feelings about their brands, portfolios and divisions during earnings calls without realizing that they are handing competitors valuable information, and I’ve seen direct reports over-explain why they made a decision without being asked, exposing a lack of confidence or preparedness (I usually tell them the Bernie story sometimes more than once). I have also seen how effective keeping the competition guessing can be.

I did three different rotations at Pfizer Consumer Healthcare on a great Upper Respiratory portfolio that included Sudafed, Benadryl, Actifed, Sinutab. While there were a few competitors at the time, (the set has shifted mightily these days with the Rx-OTC launches of Zyrtec, Claritin, Allegra, Flonase, Rhinocort and Mucinex just to name a few), the most consistent competition came from McNeil and Tylenol’s Upper Respiratory portfolio. I remember working hard to overcome the good advertising, aggressive merchandising (for those who remember the in-line Tylenol store) and the swagger that J&J brought to the trade. On our side we had strong equities and frankly, we were best in class at marrying product performance and consumer claims. However, I was constantly frustrated by our claims approval process because whenever Pfizer Consumer Healthcare (PCH) wanted to challenge a claim that Tylenol was making or make a similar claim based on consumer research, our counsel would point out how certain they were that McNeil had mountains of support for what they were saying. Imagine my surprise when Pfizer Consumer was acquired by J&J and I discovered that McNeil had nearly identical rationale and support to PCH for their claims.

The point is to ask: Am I sharing this to improve an outcome or just to make myself feel better? I have found that the best leaders, peers, clients, and friends are adroit at drawing the distinction, and honest about when they just need to violate the rule and “share”.

Bernie passed away in February 2017, but this April 29th, a group of Camp Kennebec Alumni will be getting together to celebrate 110 years of Kennebec.